October 10, 2011 ... And to celebrate TF2’s fourth birthday Valve released today their 253rd update for the game. And what an update we have been granted! This update introduces 17 new weapons for various classes, bringing the total count of weapons usable in the game to the proud number of 500! Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen, from today on you can select between 500 different weapons for our beloved 9 classes. Valve has also added new hats, some of which can be crafted or found as well as (...)

Seriously: Sometimes I would give my left nut for a MUTE ALL button ...

Okay, I realize that I’m a bit unfair in my harsh judgement. I know that a random assortment of people on a pub server will never display much teamwork and tactical proceeding will always be rudimentary at best. It’s a pub game, after all. But I dare to say the percentage of really new and inexperienced players is relatively low these days on the pubs, even with TF2 having opened up to Macs recently. So most people will have indeed some (though varying) knowledge of the maps and the game. (...)

Yes, I saw that. In a book. The book also had unicorns, flying monkeys and incorruptible politicians. Sadly in reality too many engies are self-absorbed retards who think their sentry will make them Gods. I guess these engies are very much like snipers drunken with the possibility of one-shot-kills: I AM THE SNIPER, YOUR GOD, LORD RULING OVER YOUR PETTY LIFE. And the engy does not even have to concern himself with aiming. Yet most meet the sobering realization that sentries have been (...)

Up-to-date news. Exclusive information. High quality journalism. Competent commentary from within the heart of the community. Oh wait, we are talking about the Fort here. Strike the above and replace that with „Just another blog by a bloke with delusions of thinking his opinions were in any way relevant (or even interesting)“. That’s the consequential development of the internet in general and the phenomenon labeled web 2.0 in specific: Everybody inclined to offer his opinion is given (...)

... is easy. Getting it upgraded to Level 3 is a different matter. Because, you see, that requires metal. Okay, that’s what a dispenser is for, right? Of course of having a dispenser to produce metal you have to build one first. And if you want the dispenser to give you metal in more than a leisurely pace that dispenser needs upgrading, too. Which again requires metal. Well, usually there’s a lot of metal lying around in different sized packages. So all is simple enough then ... In theory, (...)

NOBODY expects a spy! My chief weapon is disguise ... disguise and cloak ... cloak and disguise ... My TWO weapons are cloak and disguise ... and ruthless backstabbing ... My THREE weapons are cloak, disguise, and ruthless backstabbing ... and an almost fanatical deathwish to enemy medics ... My FOUR ... no ... AMONGST my weapons ... Amongst my weaponry ... are such elements as cloak, disguise ... I’ll respawn (...)

We all love teleporters. Engineers love to build ’em; the rest of the team loves to use ’em. Just sometimes there’s a minor detail which could use some improvement: The direction of the Exit ... I’m sure that has happened to all of us before. You jump into a teleporter, dematerialize, materialize on the other end and - find yourself in front of a wall. You have to turn around, and if it was the first time you have used that particular TP you have to get your bearing before proceeding (...)

Yesterday I found a brain. Looked like an adult brain, but was very well preserved. Almost unused (though traces of alcohol abuse were clearly noticeable). Certainly had not run on full load often. I found it on a server running an achievement map. I asked if somebody was missing this brain, but nobody answered. In retrospect the question was misleading anyhow. Because evidently nobody was missing anything. Certainly not other players with tons of spam, while standing in front of a (...)

Do you want to know a good way to make an uber fail? Just tell nobody! Go in with your uber-mate, kill a few enemies, destroy a sentry and then either retreat or die a glorious death. While you teammates are fighting on another corner. And rest assured the enemy players will respawn and the sentry will be rebuilt just in time to greet any teammate of yours who’s making another run for the point. See, often enough an uber isn’t enough to take a point. Most of the times you are lucky if the (...)